Matrimonial Query

1962 my life dream had come true when among others I got appointed in the office of the Accountant General as a UDC@ four times salary than the state government.

My elementary education was given second preference to participation in any marriage ceremony of a distant relation. Often my absence from the school was preferred to my attendance at such celebrations with the remark “Which ‘Accutandi’ is otherwise awaiting him? Let him go and enjoy.” Retired Elders  at the marriage celebration were all in praise of me as I used to put live charcoal on their ‘chilum’ and often change the stale water of the  hubble-bubble with fresh one.

Ours was a group of thirty-five. But for two the rest were Kashmiri Pundits. It was nothing short of the discovery of a readymade treasure for Bulji the professional matrimonial mediator. He visited all the prospective grooms including the ones who were already married. I was not an exception.

August 1963, I manipulated my exit from the ‘Accutandi’ despite DIR in view of the 1962 Chinese aggression (Defence of India rule). Under DIR, the excuse for an exit if proved false resulted in imprisonment of the accused. The hard decision to quit the job with highest social status declined my matrimonial prospectus under the projectile formula with its parabolic axis parallel to y-axis.

I joined the Mathematics Department at the J&K University at Naseem Bagh and completed my studies by the end of 1966 with an additional degree of teachers’ training. Simultaneously I was stealthily on the pay roll of the Planning Department.

Matrimonial offers started to trickle down again. My denial caused recurring worry to my father the only parent. Contrary to modest plenty I used to be in a three-piece suit with a matching necktie. It portrayed me deceitfully and I was conscious of it. The gulf between the standard of life between the aspirant offer and that of mine was too wide to be bridged. The other reason for denial was that some were seen in the company of some while in the university or elsewhere.

One evening Rajinder( later on IPS) met me at Habbakadal Bridge and said: “Dass why did you refuse to marry Miss X?”

I said: “Bloody fool, instead of forewarning me, you are asking me the reason for my refusal. Reliable sources forewarned me. I am told that she was fluting with you, enjoying shikara rides around Dal and Nigin Lakes besides, non-veg feasts in hotels and elsewhere.”

Rajinder said: “Be cool. You too had to enjoy shikara rides, feasts and…..and finally refuse the proposal.”

Aghast! I said: “I have done much nonsense in my life but never stooped low in my own eyes. I spit at your conscience.”

Unfortunately, though he retired from next to the highest post in the Police department, yet his matrimonial life was neither smooth nor a success.

Peace be to his dead conscience.