Wednesday 14 June 2017

Bued Babi

1961 on my return from Verinagh, I had lost appetite completely. Even seeing cooked rice from distance would cause me to vomit. I used to visit my matamal very often. One day my arrival was at the time of morning meal. All the family members took their position on their respective wooden chowki. My mami asked me too to sit for meal. I expressed my inability because of loss of appetite. Peace be to her soul, she told me to try her dish. My resistance proved an exercise in futility. I finished my thali of hot hakea rus hakh and tout tout (hot)butea first of all and asked for a little more. It had a soothing effect on my eyes and restored my normal appetite. It was no less than a magic in her hands. She was Mrs. Radha Rani Ambardar from Dalhasanyar and to us she was Bued Babi to differentiate her from Laket Babi. Both were very nice Mamis. Today our grandchildren know neither matamal nor any Mami.

Enjoy trip to J&K University 1964-65

Image may contain: 1 person, sitting, beard and sunglasses
Kripal Singh
KRIPAL SINGH
Characters: Kripal Singh: Student of English Department J&K University, Naseem Bagh, Srinagar, Kashmir.
Professor Kenneth S Woodroof (Oxon): Visiting Professor to the English Deptt. J&K University
Dr. Basant Ram: Student of Mathematics Department, J&K University,Srinagar. (Retired HOD Mathematics Science College, Jammu)
D V Gupta: Student Mathematics Deptt. Proctor University Hostel.Retired Principal Dewan Badri Nath School.(A big name at Jammu for coaching Mathematics)
Dr. Mahesh: Research scholar, Zoology Deptt. Retired HOD Zoology Ms. U. Sharma: Student of Hindi (First Position and then Govt. lecturer)
Qadir : Hostel cook. Long hair up to ear tips; fur cap covering a little of his head; military shirt running up to knees with loose flaps; Shorts going a little down his knees; Complexion changed to jet black for the only fuel to cook was firewood and that too fresh. Could be recognized in the daylight only.
Kirpal Singh was a unique character in the campus. He was from some village in Hoshiarpur, Punjab. He often used to introduce himself as son of Jagjit Singh Principal Higher Secondary School, Hoshiarpur. It was only from the admission record that some overzealous could discover his name. Mischievous boys around generally affected a laughter, raised their hand to give a sound strike on his stretched hand to receive a clap. Poor fellow could never assimilate their mischief to fool him.
Kripal Singh and Professor Kenneth Woodroof (Oxon) were chums. While Kripal used to talk to Woodroof in crude Punjabi, Woodroof would respond in Oxon English. Either’s language was Greek to either. The Language barrier was surmounted; know not how they understood each other in their respective native languages. The riddle is yet a mystery. May be body language was the means of communication.
Woodroof being a visiting Professor was highest paid in the University @Rs.1000/pm. He used to stay in a Houseboat at Dalgate @Rs.500/pm.
He was a chronic bachelor. Urchins around the ghat at Dalgate used to look for the arrival of Woodroof, who used to throw a few coins in the lake that the boys would dive and recover. I have personally seen Woodroof a number of times sitting on knees in the front row to enjoy bachea nagmea (dance) of Gani Trali at Nishat Bagh. He did not enjoy good relations with his HOD, Dr. M S Wantt, who himself was an eccentric character. It is said that Woodroof took up his next posting in Japan where his soul and body divorced each other.
Those days the University Canteen was housed in a small space under the staircase of the English Department.
One morning while Ms U Sharma was enjoying a cup of tea, Basant Ram stepped in. Limited space and limited chairs, Basant Ram was about to retrace his steps, when to his surprise Ms Sharma offered him a chair next to her. Both being from Jammu, native affinity had influenced Ms Sharma. She even paid four anna coin for the natural guest.
Bassant Ram mistook the friendly gesture as her romance for him. He could not control himself thereafter. He even threatened to kill Dr. Umesh to whom Sharma was likely to be married.
Last day of the month, D V Gupta after dinner deputed Qadir to each room with the monthly bill. Qadir opened the door of the Basant Ram’s room. He saw Basant Ram in his bed taking a nap after dinner. He closed the door and left for the next. In his half-sleep, Basant Ram heard the sound of the opening of the door; he raised his head to see the visitor. Seeing no body there, he slept again. Qadir on his return replayed his action. Seeing the status quo position, he closed the door again. Basant Ram again in his half-sleep heard the sound of the opening of the door. He raised his head again to find nobody there. Vanish of the horrible image of Qadir in his let loose dress and abnormal hair style caused horror to Bassant Ram.
Ghulam Mohammad Bhat my classmate in the ground floor heard screeching sobs of Basant Ram. He rushed to first floor and pulled Basant Ram who was about to jump through the window in hysteria.
Soon it was all a mess. All the boarders headed by Kirpal Singh huddled in our room(D V Gupta the proctor and I shared a common room). Basant Ram was somehow laid on the neat and clean bed of D V Gupta. Some boys massaged his sole, others cleaned his foamy sputum and some his flowing nose. Intermittently he stood ferociously and cried ‘mujay choaddho’ (leave me alone). The ferocious scene emptied the packed room. Frightened boys rushed down the stairs. They cared little for others who stumbled in the process.
It was a long awaited opportunity for Kripal Singh to show his leadership traits. He seized both the opportunity and the telephone.“Hallo”, son of Jagjit Singh, emergency. One boarder serious.
From the other end: “What VC has to do with it? You phone the hospital emergency. I shall also ring them.”
“Hallo, son of Jagjit Singh. One boarder serious. Come soon.”
“Where?” from the other end.
In response: “Hostel.”
“Which hostel?” said the emergency doctor from the Hospital.
In response: “University Hostel.”
“Where is it located? Give me the location.” said the doctor.
In the meantime all the boarders huddled around the telephone to enjoy Kripal Singh. They controlled their laughter and managed with a quiet smile only.
Kripal Singh said: “You reach Dargah gate; (simultaneously drawing site plan in the air) go this side then this side and then that side….you will reach the hostel.
Boys around could no more resist. They screeched with laughter.
Kripal with live telephone tugged to his ear lost control on him and shouted at boys: “You bloody fools can’t you be quiet for a little while.”
Doctor on the other end became nervous. He took the reprimand for him and said: “Kindly let us know nature of the problem so that we shall send specialist of the same.”
“I know nothing about the problem. He shouts ‘Mujay choad dho’ (Leave me alone). And that is the problem.” said Kripal in response.
Soon the other end became dead and a little later; an ambulance came to a screeching halt at the hostel gate.
By this time Basant Ram was perfectly all right. The medical staff and the doctor alighted from the ambulance. The doctor was nervous. In view of Kripal’s behaviour on phone he was shaky and expected worse situation.
Fumbling with his stethoscope, the doctor stammered: “Who is the patient?”
We were all quiet and pointed towards Basant Ram. The doctor heaved a sigh of relief and said: “He is normal. We were expecting a serious and a dying patient. (Seeing no sardar around)Who among you is son of Jagjit Singh?”
Without any response, we bundled Basant Ram into the ambulance and a few of us accompanied him. Basant Ram was admitted. Others returned to the hostel on foot at dead of the night. I went to my home at Zaindar Mohalla and climbed the wall to enter into my home through the kitchen window at first floor stealthily to give a surprise to my other family members the next morning. I volunteered to serve as an attendant to Basant Ram. Next day Professor Jan Mohammad paid a visit to the patient. Professor’s visit gave VIP treatment to Basant Ram. The third day, after University hours, our HOD Professor M R Puri’s and classmates’ visit aborted when Basant Ram waving my Tiffin box arrived in white duck pant hale and healthy.
Other batch mates of the session from the English Department were:
Piaray Lal Waguzari (Retired English lecturer)
Professor Divendar Koul (Retired Principal Vishwa Bharti College, Srinagar)
Dr. Tej Nath Dhar (Ex. HOD English Deptt. Kashmir University; Visiting
Professor Eritrea University East Africa)
Professor Amin (English Deptt. Kashmir University Retd.)
The late Badri Shahbadi Advocate
Akhtar Hussain Jan from Babapora (Left for Pakistan. He was interested more in Precious stones)
AND
R L Kampasi.
Grateful to R L Kampasi for reminding me the name of Akhtar Hussain Jan.
The late Lassa Koul (Director Radio Kashmir, assassinated by militants in February 1990)
The late Mrs. Sarla Wattal
Mrs. Veena Koul and many others.
God willing ‘phir milany ghay’