‘Dedh te Shodhuen hunz Dedh’

Dedh was a common name among both Kashmiri Pundits and Kashmiri Muslims to give honour to elderly ladies. Ruheat Dedh, Runiem Dedh, Gonear Dedh, Zoon Dedh, Lal Dedh, Divea Dedh among the two communities had Dedh common to both.

 Dedh te Shodhuen hunz Dedh were two sisters in eighties. Dedh was my maternal grand mother. For others they were Arinimal and Kuej respectively; pure Kashmiri names on local trees and plants.

My mother died in 1949 at 37 when I was ten. She was Sanpeakuej for her parents and Kakenie for her children. Kuej means a young tree. She was survived by her husband, my two brothers elder to me, my younger brother and my younger sister hardly one year old.

Elderly ladies in our neighbourhood, our well-wishers as they were, successfully persuaded Dedh to take care of us the orphans including the infant ones.  

The aunt of my deceased mother, Shodhuen hunz Dedh would often visit us. Both in eighties, the elder used to treat the younger one as her daughter and the younger treat the elder as her mother. I often used to miss school to get ‘Dumbie-kulpush’ and brain for the Massie from the ‘sikea puej’. Tathie-Pudit Prasad Joo Kaul, the nephew of Dedh used to pay a monthly pocket money of Rs.7 from his pension of few rupees to his aunt Dedh, my maternal grand mother.

21^st Century, pocket money to parents has become obsolete and to aunts and uncles is out of question.

Despite modest plenty of those days, the life was lively. Festivals were loaded with festivities. Birthdays; Khetchie Mavus, Gardea Butea, Puen, family picnics for weeks in ‘Doonga’, frequent havens, Hurie Athuem havan at Parbat, Zungea trie, Nawreh at Badam Varie, Baishakhi at Nishat, zerea kasie, kahnether, frequent sondhear, shishuer, Dupean butea , Durie butea and many more occasions were reason for get-together of different families under one roof.

Heratch Mubarakh

Wishing Shivratri Greetings has almost become a ritual. Gone are the days when in our childhood, we used to enjoy SHIVRATRI right from the day the schools would close for winter vacations for a period of two and a half month. We used to call these holidays as Herath holidays. Summer vacations of one month used to be named as Amarnath vacations. It was probably because the KP students were in majority.

The special event of Heratch was ‘harea-zaar’; playing of sea-shells. In each family, the family members, irrespective of age eighty and eight used to play with sea shells. At times the excited atmosphere would reach the climax point followed by a hot atmosphere that ensued exchange of hot words also.  The two Dedh sisters used to be partners or opponents of a big circular circle of players consisting of players from eighty to eight age-group. To describe the scene in words is beyond my capacity. May be this was the reason of no heart trouble those days.

My personal group consisted of both Muslim and Pundit boys. The venue to play was Zaindar Sabuen Murguzar or kathleshwar Temple courtyard. The players would pour from Tankipora to Purshyar, Habbakadal. One of the group Sheikh Ghulam Nabi Haji retired as executive engineer some retired as teachers…. and some as Rehman Kanduer continued to be in business as baker. One of them in eighties used to wish me while driving his horse driven cart.

The Muslim lady-potter with ‘sonie potuel, pervas, sunivarie,duel dulijea noeat and other audinie gudinie in a big basket called ‘phoet’ on her head used to give a call before she would enter into our courtyard to be welcomed by the eldest lady in the family with a glass of water for ‘aleath’. For vatuk pooja, a brand new ‘Vague’ a mat woven of grass from the Dal Lake was delivered at home by the Dal Huenz. Fish too was a home delivery item. I still remember the contours of the ‘gadea voel’ who used to come to us with the fresh fish.

The next day after the Shivratri, on Salam, elders from immediate relations and family friends would pour in to convey greetings & pay  

@ half a rupee as Herach Kherch to each child awaiting with expectations. The amount of the Kherch to the new brides and others was not exceeding Rs. 5 each.  

Thereafter, would start the picnic session. We used to accompany our mother to her mother's place wherefrom we used to accompany our grand mother to her elder sister’s place for a picnic to the nearby mandir garden or Shiwalun or Badamwari. This function is known as Zang-trai. It was a get-together for both children and elders. At the picnic we were served with shiri-chai & kehwa with a telwore and kulchwore respectively. Children used to get 50% of the size the elders would get. This was probably because that time there was no hum Dho & Hemarey Dho. The number of children in the family and the size of the telwore or kulchwore were inversely proportional.

Nawreh used to assure new clothes to children besides varieties of mutton preparations and picnic to Badamwari, and so was welcome with open arms.

 Today’s children, the careerist can't dream the enjoyment that we have relished despite modest plenty. Prosperity and career has been at a heavy price.