Sunday 20 April 2014

M for Mischievous

Bahach is a big boat. Four-fifth of the boat is covered with a thatched or shingle roof. Its front and a little of the rare portion are open. Bahach serves partly as the floating house to its inmates and partly to carry goods from one place to the other. The wife of the boatman sits at the rare portion holding the oar to rudder the floating Bahach. The boatman on the open front pushes the Bahach forward with hamtul, a long smooth pole of three to four inch diameter

Once a Bahach in the midst of Wular Lake was caught in a wind storm. The lady at the rare started beating her breast, crying and praying to Babh Shakur Din, a shrine on the hillock overlooking the lake: “Babh Shakur Deena bachav(Babh Shakur Deen save us). Her infuriated husband thrashed his wife: “This is His wind storm, is he not seeing it?(Yehi che amisenzei cheth. Ye chuna nete vechaan. Yemisenz cheth temisei chekh che venan becahv. Keri dheli chope). You are asking the planter of the wind to save us”.
A widow in Ashmuj, a militant infested village in Kulgam Tehsil was teaching English alphabet to her orphan grand son. Both her husband and her son had died while fighting for their cause.
Thus the grand mother, swinging her body to and fro started: “A for Abdullah; B for Bakshi; C for Congress; D forDandh /Donkey; E for elephant; F for Farooq; G for Goat/Geelani …..M for Mischievous; N for National Conference…….the young scholar was surprised and instead of repeating M for Mischievous, he said M for Mufti. The granny insisted M for Mischievous. The boy said: “If A for Abdhullah and B for Bakshi stand for names why M should stand for an adjective. The grand mother said: “Both mean the same. Let you read M for Mischievous Mufti”. A little later, the boy asked his grand mother: “How do both mean the same?"
http://youtu.be/8v-itSZMoUY

Thus explains the Granny:
“People have little memory. In January 1990 the double M was the Home Minister of India. He brought out the Indian Army from their barracks to the civil areas in Kashmir. He brought CRP Force and BSF to the valley. He caused massacre of people at Maisuma Bazar and many other places. During his Home Ministry many of the mourners participating in the funeral procession of Moulavi Farooq were shot dead. He manipulated kidnapping of his daughter Dr.Rubaya Syed. He promulgated the Armed Forces Special Powers Act (AFSPA) in Jammu & Kashmir. Most of the times he was sent as an MLA to the Assembly by courtesy Khaliq DC as an uncontested member.
Today the author of all the atrocities is talking of healing touch to the wounds caused by him. He is asking for the withdrawal of the armed forces which were installed by him. Today he talks for the withdrawal of the Armed Forces Special Powers Act enacted by him in 1990. He used to rig the elections and today he claims to be the champion of fair elections of 2002. I wonder how he is spared by those who suffered injuries of different intensities because of him. It is nothing short of Double M’s cheth (Wind storm). Let people forget the historical facts, but I remember my deep wounds are because of the double M”.
While teaching, the Granny resumed the  swing to her body and said: “Go ahead and read G for Geelani; G for Goat; M for Mischievous Mufti….M for Manipulator”. The son said: “Why Geelani is associated with Goat?” “This is one of the teaching methods” said the Granny. One event is remembered by associating it to the other. He draws pension as an ex-MLA. He could not get enough strength in the Assembly to be the Chief Minister of the State. And he knows that he will never get absolute majority to be the State Head. For face saving he boycotts elections. Out of vengeance he has taken a vow to rule all the grave yards in the State. He gets lot of pleasure and satisfaction in ruling the dead and is contented that if not live he could be the emperor of the dead. A Persian quotation is ‘In case of no worry keep a goat to purchase worries’. Thus G for goat and to remember it associates it with G for Geelani. Both cause worries.
Brijdass chu venan lasiv te basiv.


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